When we couple up with someone, there’s this tendency to think that we should knoweverythingabout them.
Once you become an established couple, having a conversation to determine where you stand is totally acceptable.
If you’re running late, for example, you should check in and explain the situation.
It’s a simple courtesy.
If everything doesn’t line up perfectly, don’t worry!
Decide what your own deal-breakers are and then be open to your significant other’s wish list.
Make it an adventure!
Pro tip: Never assume that someone wants to have children.
Becoming a parent is a very personal choice.
If your partner says they don’t want kids, believe and respect them.
Don’t hatch a plan to change their mind.
It probably won’t work and will likely lead to resentment.
One reason for this stems from needing to know how your significant other handled themselves with former partners.
Did they play a role in the breakup?
Have they found closure, or are they still harboring feelings for someone else?
It’s uncomfortable but important for your future.
They may not even be aware by how often they mention it.
Have these conversationsbeforegetting married or moving in together.
Use the opportunity to disclose any debts, bankruptcies, savings accounts, or obligations.
No one likes to talk about budgeting, but it’s not a topic that should be ignored.
Over time, these talks will get easier.
Pro tip: Don’t take this lightly.
This includes medical and mental health issues but also covers sexually transmitted diseases.
Pro tip: Rather than immediately jumping into this conversation (which could scare anyone away!
), pay attention to how your partner discusses their romantic history and ask pertinent questions.
If it seems like a pattern exists, ask about it.
A little restraint in this area can go a long way.
Pro tip: If your significant other seems reluctant to share certain things, respect that.
Sometimes, we get lucky and everyone just clicks and the world is a glorious, wonderful place.
Other times, we’re not so lucky and that’s also okay.
Pro tip: Don’t dig too deeply on this.
Then the vicious cycle begins.
The more details you know, the more you will torture yourself with visuals.
It’s not something that can be changed so why even waste energy on it?
Pro tip: Focus on the here and now instead of the past.
There’s a reason why you’re in the present and the exes are in the past.
Trust in your relationship instead of dwelling on ancient history.
Every mistake they’ve ever made
Has your partner ever been arrested?
Fired from a job due to suspicious activity?
Banned from Vegas casinos for a gambling problem?
We all make mistakes and the last thing anyone needs is someone holding theirs over their heads.
That means that whatever private activities you are doing do not need to be shared or accounted for.
Otherwise, it’s not really anyone’s business.
This could be a celebrity, co-worker, or even a family member.
For many, these are just harmless feelings that pose no threat to their primary relationship.
Curiosity can get the best of us and we might ask to know the identity.
Pro tip: Having this information is probably going to make you jealous and critical of that person.
Why cause a problem where there isn’t one?
Pro tip: Everyone does their business a little differently from each other.
We just don’t need to know about it.
Instead, focus on nurturing your relationship, building trust, and enjoying your shared journey.
