When you lack direction, it’s easy to get lost in your emotions.
You might even feel like you’re drowning in your own sorrow.
How long it takes depends on the situation and how ready you are to let go and move on.
While you might be anxious to see immediate results, don’t rush it.
Finding closure is a process.
Take your time as you work through the issues and be kind to yourself along the way.
Don’t sugarcoat or gloss over it.
This is one of those times when someone else’s opinion can’t matter.
Be honest with yourself and acknowledge all of the ways in which the situation feels horrible.
Give yourself permission to dwell on it for a few hours (or even a full day).
We aren’t supposed to be angry, depressed, jealous, or sad.
Those things are negative, right?
That’s completely unrealistic.
Here’s the thing.
We are emotional beings.
We are hardwired to have feelings so denying them just makes us act crazier.
If you have a good friend who will listen without judgment, unload on them.
Just let it all out!
Don’t think about what you are saying.
Just let it flow and write it down as it comes to mind.
Don’t restrict yourself in any way.
If the tears come while you’re doing this, allow them to escape your body.
Don’t judge any of this, let things unfold naturally.
Another option is to use guided meditation.
Download a meditation app and choose a session that provides support for working through difficult emotions.
Be mindful of what you are feeling by internally saying things such as “I am sad.
Whatever mode of expression you chose, keep it legal and safe while making it entirely your own.
If listening to music and dancing (or sobbing… or sobbing while dancing!)
works for you, then do that.
For a decade, I lived right next to a corn field.
Man, I miss those corn fields!
Take responsibility for your role
This is a tough one for many people.
Who wants to acknowledge that they played any role in the creation of their own suffering?
What happened to you is not your fault.
You may still, however, find some healing by working through the other steps in this article.
For everyone else, take some time to think about what is happening and be brutally honest with yourself.
Again, journaling might help provide some clarity.
after you snag a better understanding of what has truly happened, you may need to make amends.
If you find yourself in this situation, be heartfelt and direct when asking for someone else’s forgiveness.
Our minds will begin to swirl with seemingly endless possibilities in an effort to find some relief.
Eventually, we will start to turn to others for help.
At some point, though, you will have to accept that there might not anything more to discover.
In fact, you might not get any answers at all.
Grieve the loss
Grief will come in many different forms depending on what you’ve lost.
Maybe you left a job that you’ve had for a long time.
Perhaps, you’re going through an especially painful breakup.
You could also be grappling with the sudden death of a loved one.
Think back on all of the ways you were happy before this situation happened.
Reflect on all of the positive feelings and memories.
Browse through pictures, read letters, and laugh about funny stories.
You will know when you are ready to move forward.
Any one of us can end up in a situation that seems overwhelming.
If you need help getting through it, don’t hesitate to ask for it.
Pay particular attention to any patterns that may have helped lead you to this point.
Don’t be alarmed if the idea of letting go feels scary.
Some people find that burning their journals, pictures, or other mementos is symbolic.
There’s just something so freeing and purifying about fire!
It can be hard to get work done, eat properly, or even sleep.
It might even feel like there’s a void waiting to be filled.
This is a great time to refocus your energy and bring a greater sense of positivity into your life.
After all, that’s what finding closure is all about, right?
Enroll in a cooking class.
Sign up for a 10k race.
Go back to school.
The sky’s the limit!
Most importantly, allow yourself to kill the door on that painful chapter of your life and move forward.
