As a professor, I’ve had to mediate between students assigned to work on group projects together.
In both situations, conflicts would arise and we’d have to find a way to overcome them.
I noticed a pattern emerge, however, that, when present, would halt progress dead its tracks.
To be fair, let’s say you really are surrounded by people who are making your life miserable.
A toxic person will stay in that situation and happily accept the role of victim.
It’s a convenient way to blame everyone for all of your problems without having to address anything.
Write it all down and come up with a plan for making things right.
You will feel empowered, and best of all no more blaming or complaining!
Gossip is a part of life and will likely continue to exist until the end of time.
That being said, you have a choice about whether to be an active participant.
You don’t want to be associated with that kind of negativity.
It’s also understandable that you might need to vent, following an argument.
Take action: Get honest with yourself about things you’ve said to hurt people.
If someone has confronted you about your actions, take a deep breath and take ownership of your behavior.
Apologize, if needed, and commit to being more respectful in the future.
There’s nothing wrong with relying on your support system when you are struggling.
Do you find yourself hiding when you know people are asking for help?
Do you make excuses for why you’ve got the option to’t lend a hand or offer assistance?
Be realistic and honest, if you are also struggling.
Anything is better than nothing!
Your friends have disappeared
It’s funny.
They are, after all, pulling away for a reason.
Have you been negative, demanding, or overly dramatic?
More than likely, you have pushed people away without even realizing it.
Take action: Be brutally honest with yourself about why your friends have gone into hiding.
If it is, apologize for your actions and commit to making some changes.
It’s entirely different, however, if you seem to thrive when things are going wrong.
Drama can be addictive, especially if anything you see on reality television is true.
Take action: Explore the reasons why you might be attracting drama.
Identify any negative patterns that keep things on the crazier side.
It’s also possible that you are feeling ignored and neglected by loved ones.
If so, communicate how you are feeling and then find new, productive ways to keep in touch.
Take action: Accept someone’s apology and work hard on forgiveness.
Stop obsessing over, and throw away, mementos from a failed relationship.
Find a new hobby where you might make new friends.
Wouldn’t it be great if we could be both rightandhappy all the time?
Is that possible or realistic?
Besides, in most situations, there will be more than one way to be “right.”
It’s all about compromise and seeing other people’s perspectives!
It’s a game-changer!
You dominate the conversation
Think about the last time you sat down and talked with a friend.
Did the conversation volley back and forth between you or was it more one-sided?
Are you regularly hogging the spotlight and cutting people off?
It can happen to the best of us so don’t feel bad.
