First dates arenerve-wrackingenough.Will the guy be a creep?
Will it be awkward?
Will you get food stuck in your teeth?
Considering most of us passgasmore than10 times a day, this is essential strategizing, ladies.
Believe it or not though, it’s possible for you to actually rebound from a rogue toot!
Here’s how to overcome a fart ona first dateand still (fingers crossed) win over your crush!
“If it’s the non-smelly kind, say and do nothing.
Act like it never happened.”
If you’re in a crowded place, you candefinitelypretend it didn’t happen.
That sound could be anything!
That smell could be the weird looking guy at the next table!
Mask the sound
Think it’s going to be a loud one?
If you cancamouflage the sound of your fart, do it.
“Accidentally” put your glass down a little harder than normal.
Pretend to drop your fork on your plate so it clangs a little bit.
Laugh a little more loudly at your date’s jokes.
If you’re at the movies, wait for a noisy scene.
Head to a louder area of wherever you are.
Dowhateveryou can to drown out the sound of your toot!
“This will allow the sanitizer smell to fill the air instead of your butt air.”
Use the Shaggy defense
“It wasn’t me!”
Your crush may claim to have heard, smelled, or even somehowseenyou fart.
Now, no pun intended, it’s time to gaslight them: it wasn’t you.
No matter what,it wasn’t you.
Hey, maybe they’re just insanely projecting their own gastrointestinal insecurities onto you.
And there’s a legit reason to plead the Fifth.
So, no need to throw in the towel just yet!
However, there are some times when denying is just not possible.
Not a good way to start a relationship off."
Maintain a sense of humor
There’s alotthat’s funny about this.
Relationship coach and MDDr.
Dating and relationship coachChristine Baumgartnersuggests saying, “I bet you’re relieved I went first!”
Is it working?"
Behrendt strongly recommends cracking up at your cutting the cheese.
“It’s gonna really change the focus of whatever’s going on unless you’re laughing.
That’s almost a meet-cute!”
I accept that it’s over.'
Acknowledge it and be funny about it."
If he farts, ignore it, asMiss Manners herselfrecommends it’s only polite if passing gas goes unmentioned.
What a relief!"
Then move it right along, unless you want some really bad intestinal karma.
“Might it ruin the date or chances for a second date?
You need someone who can accept you as a real person.
And real people fart.”
“You never know,” she said.
to get her out of a horrible date!"
And if he doesn’t call you because of one toot?
Unfortunately, if you avoidallthese things, you may end up starving to death.
What to do now?
Trying to relax, because stress can also make you swallow more air than usual.
“Often people aren’t even aware that they’re gulping down air,” Dr. Kosinski explained toWebMD.
Or talk to your doctor about stress reduction techniques."
Now go fart er,forth and conquer the man of your dreams!
