Ezell, who also conducts dating workshops, noted thattextinghas become increasingly important to daters.
Of course, that raises the question: What are you evensupposedto write in a text and when?
Either way, there is no set formula when it comes to post-date texting.
However, expertshavefound certain texts to be more effective than others.
“This guideline stipulates that a person should wait three days after the first date to make contact.
But three days is alongtime to spend agonizing over how you think the date went.
So, justwhatquestion should you be asking?
When speaking toThe List, Lavelle recommends asking, “Did you get home safely?”
He continued, saying, “Who knows?
Indeed, a lot of meaning is conveyed through this innocuous question.
You want to play it safe and express your excitement without going overboard and coming across astoothirsty.
If you’re excited, then seem excited!
you could seem excited and not like a crazypants.”
He advised keeping the text short.
Procida also recommended adding a favorite emoji at the end.
End with a happy girl or boy emoji followed with some hands in the air.”
How would you react to receiving this tweet after a great first date?
Sure, it’ssupercheesy, but it’s also pretty freaking adorable and nearly guaranteed to get a smile.
Comedian Billy Procida, host ofThe Manwh*re Podcast, recommended sending a tweet like this post-date.
Instead of simply relying on a generic text like “I had a great time last night!”
Not bad for a 13-word text, right?
Of course, you don’tactuallyhave to use the bank heist metaphor if that one doesn’t suit your fancy.
Just pick something similarly clever and cheesy.
Bringing up a past discussion allows you to use it as a launch pad for a second date.
Can we get together next week?"
A second date a week later allows just enough time and space.
My schedule is pretty tight the next couple of weeks.
Can you do an afternoon this week?"
This text also leaves the door open for further post-date conversation.
This sweet text brings the best part of the date to the forefront of the other person’s mind.
Plus, you don’t have to worry that you’re coming on too strong.
And the best way to ask for the second date is by highlighting the best parts of the first.
To ghost or not to ghost
As you know,some first dates are justawful.
That said, you shouldn’teverfeel obligated to follow up at all.
On the other hand, some dates may just leave you feeling meh.
Maybe you got along, but there was just no romantic connection.
In this situation, you may feel bad ghosting your date.
Not sure if this would even interest you, but wanted to put it out there."
Address the awkwardness
You might come home from a first date feeling like you blew it.
But instead of ruminating, why not send a text?
You helped me end a long day on a good note!
I’d really like to see you again if you’re up for it?"
It’s also incredibly but not disarmingly direct.
If so, you may start weighing the pros and cons of going on a second date.
There’s no reason to add unnecessary fluff to your message.
Instead, this question allows you to play it down the middle.
“Keeping texts simple is a rule,” the expert toldThe List.
Strive for being as clear, concise, and honest as feels appropriate."
Texting this short question is straight-forward and not open to interpretation, making it perfect for this situation.
If you don’t flirt, they might not get the hint that you’re interested."
But don’t worry.
It doesn’t have to be anything outrageous.
This text is bound to get the conversation flowing without you having to lay the flirtation ontoothick.
Stroke that ego
Everyone loves a compliment here and there, right?
Great job with all of those strikes.
I am going to practice so next time I actually have a chance to beat you."
So, you know, don’t talk about bowling if you didn’t actually go bowling.
That would be weird.
This pop in of follow-up text is also a great way to build in some friendly and flirty competition.
“If he or she just says thanks, they are probably not that interested.”
This text tactic is subtle and could certainly end in a second date.
Still, it can be hard to know what to say to lock down that next outing.
“That coffee was so good!
I think you wouldlovethe lattes at…” That’s right all you need is a good setup.
In fact, Daniels actually recommends letting the other person “pursue the second date plans.”
If all goes well, you’ll probably get a text back with a date and time.
