If you’re the player, what are you doing it for?
Everyone has their own set of fears that drives them.
A courageous person can have these fears and still be honest with others as well as themselves.
Someone who is cowardly, though, plays mind games.Dr.
Georgianna Donadio, best-selling authorof the bookChanging Behaviorweighed in.
“A person who can’t be authentic is afraid,” Donadio insisted.
“And if you’re afraid, how can you have a love relationship with somebody?
What is it that you’re afraid of?
What is it that you’re afraid that they’re going to find out about you?”
Think about it, no one wants to feel like they’re being strung along or deceived.
So by playing the game you think will win you your prize, you’re actually self-sabotaging.
You’re being selfish
Playing mind games with another person is entirely about you.
All you’re concerned with is your own feelings and making yourself look like the winner.
“It’s never really exclusively about the relationship that we have with the other person.”
Someone who is straightforward about their feelings for another person effectively demonstrates that what matters most is truly connecting.
A person who plays games is not only afraid, but they’re insecure.
First of all, that’s not an attractive quality.
Second, no one wants to be with someone who is all about themselves.
You’re being dishonest
Relationships are about trust.
The only person who is afraid of being called out on their lies is a liar.
The only person who is afraid of being honest and open is someone who is dishonest and closed off.
You’re never going to have a lasting or fulfilling relationship because you’re too busy fabricating and plotting.
By hiding from another person beneath the cover of your games, you’re hiding from yourself.
Unfortunately, it looks like a lot of people these days are wasting their time.
This means that the majority of millennials are dishonest and afraid when it comes to dating and relationships.
When you think about it, that’s a huge societal problem.
At the very best, people are confused about whether they should be honest in relationships.
At worst, they think that being deceitful and manipulative is the standard for a relationship.
You’re trying to be mysterious
Yes, as humans we do crave mystery.
When we’re left in the dark about something, we yearn to know more.
When someone makes themselves less available, we want to spend more time with them.
Maintaining individuality in a relationship is healthy and important for both you and your partner.
However, a person who purposefully leaves another in the dark is intentionally being disingenuous and crafty.
It’s a bit of a riddle, but simply put, humans are complex.
That’s what keeps a relationship interesting.
In the case of playing mind games, there are two losers.
For one, the person that you’re toying with will be hurt.
However, they’ll eventually recover and move on.
The biggest loser in a relationship or a potential relationship is the one who initiates the game.
“Clear, kind communication always trumps mind games,” Opert maintained.
“When we are playing mind games we are actively making things harder.”
You also aren’t good relationship material.
The truth always comes out."
So if you truly are interested in someone romantically, you’ll want to be upfront about your feelings.
If there is a hint of trickery or deceptiveness in them, they’re not worth your time.
Smoke dissipates and mirrors crack, but the truth never does.
